Thursday, November 29, 2007

Colt & Bronko, Smear & Strong. Houston Nutt and the Name Game

By Paul Levine

Yes, I know it's Thursday, Jim Born's day.

However, Agent Born is on special assignment. At a Florida beauty pageant, someone doused Miss Lake Okeechobee with Gator poop. Jim is on the case.

Cornelia's post yesterday got me thinking more about names. Football names.

1. Shouldn't Colt McCoy (Texas) and Colt Brennan (Hawaii) be running backs and not quarterbacks?

2. Doesn't Mizzou QB Chase Daniel have the perfect name for a bartender?

3. Is there a better name for a defensive lineman than my Penn State classmate Steve Smear? As for fullbacks, how about Seattle's just retired Mack Strong. Strong's WR teammate Taco Wallace gets an honorable mention after being flattened by a tackle. As for QB's, attention must be paid to Jeff Smoker, formerly of Michigan State and the St. Louis Cardinals.

4. Trivia note. Steve Smear played Defensive Tackle. Who was the DT who played alongside him at Penn State? Clue. As far as I know, he's the only player to both become an NFL All-Pro and win a Grammy Award.

5. Does Bronko Nagurski win "best name ever" award, or is he disqualified because his real name was "Bronislau?" Either way, does he get a special award for his ring size of 19 1/2? BRONKO NAGURSKI DEMONSTRATES PROPER HAND POSITION FOR PLAYING THE CLARINET IN THE MINNESOTA BAND

6. Is there a better coach's name than Houston Nutt? Yes, Tommy Tuberville. [No, Cornelia, not Tommy Tunes. Different ball game]. Houston would win this competition if he coached, say..."Houston." Mr. Nutt, however, recently replaced Ed Orgeron at Mississippi. Sadly, Mr. Orgeron will not be taking over at Oregon.

7. Do you have any favorite players' names?
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LATEST WGA STRIKE NEWS: GUILD ON LOOKOUT FOR STRIKE-BREAKING WRITERS!



ACTORS PROVE SPEECHLESS WITHOUT WRITERS!



JOHN EDWARDS MARCHES WITH WGA STRIKERS. HILLARY CLINTON WILL ANNOUNCE HER (A) UNEQUIVOCAL SUPPORT; (B) SO-SO SUPPORT; (C) OUTRIGHT REJECTION; OR (D) BRAND NEW PANEL HEADED BY HOUSTON NUTT TO STUDY THE ISSUE...FOLLOWING ANALYSIS OF POLLING DATA.


Come back, Jim Born...

Paul

5 comments:

  1. Ok Paul, this is not about today's post, but about Tuesdays - I was driving all day and have made it a personal commitment not to check the Naked Authors site while driving, so I'm catching up with essential reading this morning. About "On Chesil Beach." You have saved me from the literary root canal. Amazing what you can write when you're a Booker winner. Also, re: Cornelia's post yesterday. I rather wanted the Lotus Elan to be me. Sad but true.

    BTW, is it me (well, as we all know, it probably is, given a complete lack of tech smarts), but I can't get your YouTube links to actually play.

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  2. patty smiley11/29/2007 8:42 AM

    I love weird names. A co-worker at a cruise ship company I used to work for collected unusual names from the ships' manifests. On occasion she would read us her collection. Usually by the fifth name we would be laughing so hard we could no longer hear her voice.

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  3. Trivial pursuit......the guy who went from being a lion to a tiger only to end up as a "stranger in my house": MIKE REID

    name game:
    Packer's Kabeer Gbaja-Biamila,who's name is such a problem they call him K G B (which I thought was something altogether different) and Brady Poppinga, sounds good for a LB.

    Jon

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  4. Mike Reid is the correct answer. Jon wins....I don't know what.

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  5. My favorite is Coco Crisp, the guy from the Red Sox. First time I heard that, I snorted out my soy milk and Raisin Bran.

    But my fave among the NFL players is the Jacksonville guy Tutankhamen Marqués Reyes.

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