Wednesday, May 09, 2007

20/20

By Cornelia

Here are twenty questions to get your day started right. My mom learned these while working as a summer camp counselor on Squam Lake in the late Fifties:

1. You have two coins (U.S. currency), the total value of which is fifty-five cents. One of them is not a nickel. What are the two coins?

2. In South Dakota, is it legal for a man to marry his widow's sister?



3. A doctor gives you three pills and tells you to take one every half hour how many minutes will the pills last?



4. Do they have a Fourth of July in England?



5. Some months have thirty one days. How many have twenty eight?

6. You are inside a rectangular house, and all sides have a southern exposure. You look out the window and see a bear walking by. What color is the bear?

7. There are three apples and you take away two. How many apples do you have?



8. How many two-cent stamps are in a dozen?



9. How many birthdays does the average person have?



10. If you had only one match, and entered a dark room containing an oil lamp, some newspaper, and some kindling wood, which would you light first?

11. Imagine you are driving a bus. When you start your trip there are an old lady named Johnson and a long-haired kid on the bus. At the first stop the lady leaves and a businessman enters. At the next stop Frankie, a young boy, enters with his little sister. Then three old ladies who have been shopping in the mall get on. After a short trip the long-haired kid leaves the bus and a man and lady enter. Paul with his dog Blue gets on, while Frankie and his sister get off, and, finally, the bus arrives at the bus station. What is the name of the bus driver?



12. If Mr Smith's peacock lays an egg in Mr Jones' yard, who owns the egg?



13. What was the (American) President's name in 1960?

14. An electric train is moving north at 100kph and a wind is blowing to the west at 10kph. Which way does the smoke blow?

15. How many animals of each sex did Moses take with him on the ark?



16. How much dirt is there in a hole 3 ft deep, 6 ft long and 4 ft wide?

17. In a large western city, 80% of the phone numbers are listed, 20% of the phone numbers are businesses, and 20% of the phone numbers start with the numeral "2". If you were to take a random sample of 1000 phone numbers from the city's phone book, how many numbers would you expect to be unlisted, non-business phone numbers that start with a numeral other than "2"?


18. How far can a dog run into the woods?



19. A woman gives a beggar 50 cents; the woman is the beggar's sister, but the beggar is not the woman's brother, how come?



20. There is a horse tied to a rope. The rope is 10 feet long. There is a bale of hay 23 feet in front of the horse. The horse is able to eat the hay, yet does not break the rope. How is that possible?

Here's a bonus question:

21. A man walks into a train station in London. A cat sits on the ledge just outside the ticket window.



The man looks askes the ticket seller, "Manx cat?"

The ticket seller shakes his head and says, "No. 9:42 express."

Explain his answer.

13 comments:

  1. For ease of answering if you want to play, here are the questions for cutting and pasting without pictures:

    1. You have two coins (U.S. currency), the total value of which is fifty-five cents. One of them is not a nickel. What are the two coins?

    2. In South Dakota, is it legal for a man to marry his widow's sister?

    3. A doctor gives you three pills and tells you to take one every half hour how many minutes will the pills last?

    4. Do they have a Fourth of July in England?

    5. Some months have thirty one days. How many have twenty eight?

    6. You are inside a rectangular house, and all sides have a southern exposure. You look out the window and see a bear walking by. What color is the bear?

    7. There are three apples and you take away two. How many apples do you have?

    8. How many two-cent stamps are in a dozen?

    9. How many birthdays does the average person have?

    10. If you had only one match, and entered a dark room containing an oil lamp, some newspaper, and some kindling wood, which would you light first?

    11. Imagine you are driving a bus. When you start your trip there are an old lady named Johnson and a long-haired kid on the bus. At the first stop the lady leaves and a businessman enters. At the next stop Frankie, a young boy, enters with his little sister. Then three old ladies who have been shopping in the mall get on. After a short trip the long-haired kid leaves the bus and a man and lady enter. Paul with his dog Blue gets on, while Frankie and his sister get off, and, finally, the bus arrives at the bus station. What is the name of the bus driver?

    12. If Mr Smith's peacock lays an egg in Mr Jones' yard, who owns the egg?

    13. What was the (American) President's name in 1960?

    14. An electric train is moving north at 100kph and a wind is blowing to the west at 10kph. Which way does the smoke blow?

    15. How many animals of each sex did Moses take with him on the ark?

    16. How much dirt is there in a hole 3 ft deep, 6 ft long and 4 ft wide?

    17. In a large western city, 80% of the phone numbers are listed, 20% of the phone numbers are businesses, and 20% of the phone numbers start with the numeral "2". If you were to take a random sample of 1000 phone numbers from the city's phone book, how many numbers would you expect to be unlisted, non-business phone numbers that start with a numeral other than "2"?

    18. How far can a dog run into the woods?

    19. A woman gives a beggar 50 cents; the woman is the beggar's sister, but the beggar is not the woman's brother, how come?

    20. There is a horse tied to a rope. The rope is 10 feet long. There is a bale of hay 23 feet in front of the horse. The horse is able to eat the hay, yet does not break the rope. How is that possible?

    Here's a bonus question:

    21. A man walks into a train station in London. A cat sits on the ledge just outside the ticket window.

    The man looks askes the ticket seller, "Manx cat?"

    The ticket seller shakes his head and says, "No. 9:42 express."

    ReplyDelete
  2. patty smiley5/09/2007 11:59 AM

    1. A fifty-cent piece and a nickle. One is not a nickle but the other one is.

    2. Not legal and not possible. If his wife is a widow, he's like dead.

    3. This is obviously a trick question.

    4. Yes, England has a Fourth of July. They just don't celebrate it.

    5. Duh. All months have 28 days.

    6. White. A polar bear (this riddle may be moot if global warming continues to kill them).

    Someone else, please. My brain has just exploded.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Oh, lord. I'm not stupid, I'm really not, but these things just flummox me, every time.

    Here goes:

    3. 60 minutes? Because you take one to start, then one the next two half hours? Argh.

    7. Two, because you just took them?

    8. Ack ;-)

    9. One every year.

    10. Um, I like the dark anyway?

    11. Rae!

    12. Evil trick question. Evil ;-)

    13. The same thing it was in 1959?

    14. Electric trains don't have smoke?

    15. I'm gonna say one, but opening myself up to looking foolish....

    16. Sounds like a grave to me....

    17. Impossible for me to answer

    18. I'm a cat person ;-)

    19. The beggar is a woman?

    20. The rope isn't attached to anything?

    Here's a bonus question:

    21. No frickin' clue ;-)

    Fun, fun, fun....do we get the answers at some point?

    ReplyDelete
  4. Okay for #17 - it reads "how many numbers would you expect to be unlisted, non-business phone numbers"

    they're unlisted so um....

    15 - er think about it. Moses? Ark? come on Rae! (I know you know, it just wasn't clicking"

    10 - i'd probably reach for the light switch before doing any of that?

    18 - halfway

    and i'll pretend I know the others that I don't know and that i'm leaving them for you guys. yep.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Okay, we're gonna get some repetition here, but I need to feel smart today.

    1. One fifty-cent coin and a nickel (the other one).

    2. Not unless he was only declared legally dead after being stuck on an island for seven years talking to a basketball.

    3. 60

    4. Yes. They also have a fifth, sixth and seventh.

    5. All of them.

    6. white

    7. two

    8. twelve

    9. one per year

    10. the match

    11. Daisy. Or maybe Marjorie, depending on who was asking.

    12. The scientific establishment, in order to do the research as to how a male bird managed to lay an egg.

    13. The same as it is now.

    14. It's electric, so there is no smoke. Unless the conductor just installed Vista on the onboard computers, in which case it is probably filling the cab.

    15. one

    16. None.

    17. None of them. And you won't get any cell phone numbers either.

    18. Halfway. After that he's running out. Or in circles. Or looking for something to pee on.

    19. They have one of those complicated modern families. Or the beggar is a woman.

    20. The other end of the rope isn't tied to anything, probably because the damn horse has learned how to undo your knots and as soon as it's done with the hay it's going to wander off and start on the neighbors' dahlias.

    Bonus: Because he's insane; that's what he says tp everyone. Just smile vaguely and nod.

    ReplyDelete
  6. 1. 50 cent piece & a nickel
    2. Dead people can't marry, can they?
    3. 60 minutes?
    4. Yes but without the fireworks
    5. Each & every one of them
    6. It better be white or we're all in trouble
    7. Two?
    8. Twelve?
    9. One a year
    10. The match, right?
    11. While I can't imagine driving a bus, if it was me my name would be Janine (last time I checked...)
    12. Whoever can get it away from the peacock?
    13. I like Ike
    14. No smoke - it's electric
    15. Moses didn't ~ Noah did. one of each
    16. no dirt in a hole is there?
    17. say what?
    18. half way, then he runs out?
    19. it's her sister?
    20. the rope isn't tied to anything?
    21. the express ran over the cat's tail?

    I'm exhausted....

    Janine

    ReplyDelete
  7. #9=You only have ONE birthday....the rest are anniversaries.
    #13= Mr President.
    #8= 12

    21=There is a bit of controvery over if the Manx [from the Isle of Man] truly exist. They don't in terms of a true gene....so the standing joke is that they are merely cats with their tail cut off....which leads me to a very old joke, from PUNCH in the 1890s:

    Chatty Passenger. "Porter ! That's one of those curious tailless Manx cats is it not "
    Crusty Porter (shortly). "No, 'taint. Morn'g 'xpress!"
    Passenger (puzzled). "E-h—I don't understand—"
    Porter. "Don't yer! Well, you come and put your toe on there 'ere down metals about 9.14 a.m. tomorrow, and —"
    Passenger (enlightened). "Ah!—I see—jus' so—" retires under cover of newspaper.

    : ^ }

    Jon

    ReplyDelete
  8. see also....cartoon: Woman walks into a barber shop and inquires,"Bob Peters here?"
    the barber replies,"No, just shaves and haircuts."

    ReplyDelete
  9. Oooo! You guys are GOOD! Especially with the Manx cat. A stepfather told that one at dinner one night. I was the first one to figure it out and it took me three days.

    And I like Daisy's comment about the smoke in the cab coming from Vista.

    ReplyDelete
  10. p.s. I think the answer to #13 is George W. Bush. But I could be wrong.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Andi....see, these things make me stupid...Moses vs. Noah. Sheesh.

    ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  12. I like the Manx cat joke. We used to have one years ago. Very cute until you realise one of the main functions of a cat's tail is so that its arse doesn't touch the carpet when it sits down.

    A horse walks into a pub and the barman says "hello sir. why the long face?"

    Rob

    ReplyDelete
  13. One of my favorite "walks into a bar" jokes ever was the one my Uncle Hunt told me a few years ago:

    A tractor walks into a bar, weeping.

    Bartender says, "Jesus, you look terrible... what happened?"

    The tractor says "I just got a John Deere letter...."

    ReplyDelete