Wednesday, April 26, 2006

The Naked and The Deb

By Cornelia

A quick glance at this page's right-hand sidebar will reveal that I'm the rookie of the group--a babe in the woods, so to speak:

My stalwart co-bloggers each have multiple published titles to their credit... that would be plural... more than one... the word books with the all-important letter "S" at the end. And then there's me, still a few weeks away from the May 8th debut of my first novel, A Field of Darkness.

If this were a baseball movie, Patty, Jacqueline, Paul, and James would be the sage mentor characters with the wry grins, a la Kevin Costner in Bull Durham, only with far more kickbutt-stellar batting averages.

I'd be the goofy Tim Robbins type, meanwhile--the one who's not exactly clear on the lyrics of "Try a Little Tenderness." The one whose best-intentioned first-season fastballs will probably end up knocking out "the sportswriter, the public address announcer, and the team's bull mascot... twice..." before he gets the slightest clue about how to comport himself on the mound.

(A confession--as baseball movies go, I far prefer this one:

because, hey, Walther Matthau and Tatum O'Neill could have made CURLING look like a great time, plus they got to have beer in their dugout.)

Last year, Sarah Weinman kindly invited me to try my hand at guest-blogging on her very fine Confessions of an Idiosyncratic Mind.

Field had been picked up by Mysterious Press the previous month, and I wrote a post about my state of mind in the aftermath:

The existence of a complete novel on my hard drive still surprises the hell out of me on a daily basis, and I'm not exactly sure how it happened. It's like suddenly remembering I built a cabin in Alaska all by myself, in between buying milk and frozen enchiladas and catching up on the laundry. It is very very cool.

It is also scary, in the same way that having to actually live in a cabin in Alaska that I built all by myself probably would be, especially because I still have to do the laundry and defrost enchiladas and everything.

This year, I'm working toward the existence of a second complete novel on my hard drive, and I'm weeks away from going on tour with Lee Child. HELLO... that's just downright surreal, for God's sake.

And as Peter De Vries once wrote:

Surrealism may be the last of the mayonnaise of romanticism oozing from the disintegrating club sandwich of the western psyche.

Though in my case, I gotta say it feels more like getting to savor the fromage-y Dada splendor at the heart of the enchilada--

--not least since I have the honor of group-blogging with such an all-star lineup of writers.

The idea of me hanging out in the Naked Authors' dugout is also both "very very cool" and "a little scary," as I consider Patty, Jacqueline, Paul, and James to be so scathingly brilliant--the veritable DiMaggios of crime writing.

Good thing there's beer.

Too bad I'm still catching up on the laundry.


  1. These days I'm certain of only a couple of things ~ the love of my family, the affection of my friends and that Cornelia Read has written a kick-ass first novel and will conduct herself admirably on tour with (and without) Lee Child! Looking forward to seeing you in Seattle and watching you soar!

  2. Wonderful first post, Miss Cornelia! Enjoy the whole enchilada.


  3. So happy to see you here, can hardly wait to hold in my hands an actual copy of the for-real published book, looking forward to the road's all good, including the enchilada and the beer ;-)

  4. I saw you more as Lori Petty in "A League of their Own" actually, it's also great to see you blogging on a regular basis at last.

    You rock. xx

  5. You guys are so awesome! Thank you very much for checking out the blog...

  6. Aw, Cornelia! I told you months and months ago not to worry. It won't be long before we'll be calling you Slugger!

  7. Think of it this way, Cornelia. Being called seasoned, experienced etc. isn't always what you hope for.

    Especially in reference to age.

    Someone has to be hip and trendy and you can't let Paul do it all on his own.

  8. You mean you DON't get woolly?

    But to continue the stealing (and somewhat rewriting) of lines from one of (as you now) my total fave movies, my dear, you may be Tim Robbins and not Kevin Costner in here but a) "god reached down and gave you a thunderbolt" and um, well, b) not in the movie but in life. don't forget WHICH actor ended up with Susan Sarandon.

    all love,

  9. Mmmm. Fromag-y dada splendor. Food and surrealism. Two great tastes that fly spaniels together.

  10. Mmmmm... fly spaniels--my favorite!

    Evil E, maybe I can just be ThunderSlug?

    Andi--or WOOLY Thunderslug?

    Sandra, I can NEVER be as hip and trendy as Paul... only aspire to achieve an homage.

  11. Hurrah Cornelia!

    Lee Child? Wow!

    Kick-ass blog post AND looking forward to hearing about the glam book tour life.

  12. Cornelia, my petit fromage, not only is your writing merveilleux but you know how to attach pictures to your posts. I'm in awe.

  13. How very cool. I thought your name sounded familiar and then I checked the Poisoned Pen calendar. Yep, I'd circled Lee Child's appearance on 05/20 and you'll be there too! Congrats on your first book! Hope I'll get to say hello while I'm there!

  14. Edgy, thank you so much for clicking through--great to see you here.

    Patty, ma petite chou, merci buckets... and thanks again for doing this.

    And Angie, please introduce yourself if you make it to Poisoned Pen, would love to meet you.

  15. Great to see more of you . . . even if it is only on the web.


  16. Great to see you, too! Hope everything is good in B'ham, and thank you for stopping by...

  17. Loved your blog! Can't wait to read your book!