Rambling thoughts from a non-rambling man:
Sex in Public PlacesWhen I was editor-in-chief of Penn State's student newspaper, "The Daily Collegian," about a zillion years ago, we did not have a "sex columnist." At the time, there was allegedly a sexual revolution going on, but I seem to have missed the battle cry.
These days,"Jill" (no last name) is the paper's sex columnist, and her current piece is "Jill Talks About Adrenaline Rush of Hooking Up with Risk of Getting Caught."
Essentially, sex in public.
Okay, so we were behind the times, with all our anti-Vietnam War editorials and blaming Nixon for everything, including awarding the 1969 mythical national championship in football to Texas...BEFORE the bowl games. (Yes, Penn State went undefeated that year).
Anyway, I'm all for a sex columnist because, unlike fellow scribbler Jim Born, I'm a hip dude and a hep cat.
Eavesdropping in the Locker RoomSo I'm in the locker room at the University of Miami student/alumni gym today, and I'm listening to two undergrads:
First Guy: Dude, I flunked the midterm in Beginning Pottery.
Second Guy: Yeah, I cut Jogging class.
First Guy: I'm thinking about taking Stretching. All chicks.
So I suppose I should confess. Back at Penn State, I failed Etiquette. Really, I had a deadline at The Daily Collegian, causing me to miss the final. A dinner party.
Jake Lassiter in Trouble AgainJust why did Jake Lassiter slug his client? The answer is revealed over on my website blog where Jake is "Flirting with Disbarment."
"Last Chance Lassiter," a prequel to the 10 book series featuring the linebacker-turned-lawyer. Herewith, as lawyers, say, a brief excerpt from Jake's disbarment hearing:
JUDGE BUCKSTROM: Apparently, Mr. Lassiter, you have a propensity for violence.
JAKE LASSITER: Not really, Your Honor. The only time I was arrested, it was a case of mistaken identity.
Q: How’s that?
A: I didn’t know the guy I hit was a cop.
Q: But in this case, Mr. Lassiter, you have admitted striking your own client.
A: Technically, he wasn’t my client. It was our first meeting, and I hadn’t agreed to represent him.
Q: So why did you hit him?
A: He came at me with a baseball bat from the collection on my office wall. Barry Bonds. Mark McGuire. Alex Rodriguez.
Q: You collect from any players who didn’t break the rules? A: Innocent until proven juiced, Your Honor.
Q: So your testimony is...your prospective client attacked you with your own bat?
A: Under Florida’s stand-your-ground law, I could have shot him with a machine gun. You can read the rest of the "transcript" here.